FUCK THAT SHIT!!!!!

April 9, 2010

I went through last week….(Weds thru Sun) …an INTENSE seminar..12-14 hour days…….that shook me out of my Comfort Zone….

It was a Self Awareness Seminar …that took me to my inner child/self … an APPRECIATION for/of ME ….with the knowledge of where my anxieties and fears come from….

I took the course originally because of my fear of public speaking …in front of a group……..I NOW realize THAT was NOT really my fear…though I only had spoken really once in my Life …at my Mother’s Funeral….did NOT speak at my father’s……my fear DID not come from public speaking……but lies further back……

the man that teaches this seminar is TOTALLY BRILLIANT….he has paper degrees you can hang on a wall…… in Psychology…..which to me are meaningless…as they are to him…..

..but WHAT he truly HAS is a GIFT …a sensitivity for everyone he encounters…..and a LOVE for Everyone he meets…

he was abused as a child….was a drug addict later in life ……has a strong Father..whom he loves ..as he teaches NEVER blame ANYTHING on your parents…Love them!!!!

.the guide is a Persian Jew…a culture I have never encountered……

our class was like 47 people…and maybe 14 were Persian Jews….

they are without a doubt one of the most physically and internally BEAUTIFUL people I HAVE EVER encountered

the ages ran from 16 to …probably me 63…..it was fascinating to me …as in one blindfolded experience….I unbeknownest to me …ended up with the 16 year old….and he had to listen to my 63 years of shit…….at one point he rubbed my arm in appreciation or comfort for the shit I was talking about…..and I realized it was the 16 yr old when he said “Well I hate my father love my mother and am not that close to my brother as he is so like my father….”

so I in our blindfoldedness ended up talking (tho we were not supposed to)…. about the Persian/Jewish culture….in my Barbara Wawa way…..

one exercise …I WILL NEVER forget…..it is when you are quiet and just stare into another’s eyes…for a few minutes as you pass each other…..at some points you are allowed to touch…other times you are not….well there was one guy who is like 18 years old ..we locked eyes….and were told to move away from each other…then to look back…..well the sadness in that young man’s eyes…..just tore me apart…then we were told to move back to stare into that person’s eyes again…..and then to touch if we wanted to….
SHIT I have NEVER cried so much or hugged so much….that kid/man hugged me like I HAVE NEVER been hugged before……

his EYES…reminded me of another experience…where we were all blind folded….and walked aimlessly as a group….at first it was fun…then I kept bumping more and more into people uncomfortably….I first felt I was in the NY subway….being pushed and then I heard people crying…and I felt I was in the cattle car of Jews/Homosexuals/Gypsies being herded to Auschwitz……

so when I looked back at this young man….all I could think of was …a Jew/homosexual/Gypsy being taken to that extermination camp…..to be gassed….. I started to cry….as did he….close but sooo distant…..

there was one woman who is 60…who was soooo shy….had a physically and verbally abusive husband….back in Persia/Iran women/wives were treated basically as slaves……had been married to this fucker…..for 30 years…physically and verbally abused…

.when she got up to the coach …after asking her questions….and her responding so quietly and meekly…he said…”Have you EVER said “FUCK”….she almost whispered “No..”….

He said well then say “Fuck That SHIT!!!!!” which she DID very quietly….and meekly…..he said “LOUDER”…her voice went up an octave…”LOUDER”….until she was SCREAMING it…..

and you know she just started to beam after that ….and when it came down to “name” our group…she said well let’s call it FTS…”Fuck THAT SHIT!! ..everyone laughed and unanimously approved it….

so the point of this blog is to GET OUT OF YOU COMFORT ZONE….and REALIZE HOW FABULOUS you are…and GIVE BACK TO LIFE the gift you were given as a child….

LOVE you ALL!!

and whether you are in relationship…..married..or not …..you will be BLOWN away by how you realize your shit ..accept it ….and either move on or stay together….EVERYONE should take themselves out of THEIR comfort zone and EXPERIENCE how wonderful they TRULY are…..

IT IS A POWERFULL FUCK THAT SHIT EXPERIENCE!!!!!!

One Response to “FUCK THAT SHIT!!!!!”

  1. Michael Paige said

    Wow Robbie – I couldn’t have written this better myself. You are a very good writer.
    I have to thank you for your inspiration in participating in this experience with you. Love you always! Michael

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