I awoke yesterday .

…staring at my ceiling ..

….at a spot about the size of my sister Daidie’s Dharmsala (sp?)  spiders ….plate size…that would appear in her room…back when she was doing research in India  for her wonderful book “Sorrow Mountain” about Ani Pachen (sp?) the Tibetan nun who fled the Chinese to India…..a “MUST” read….as it is totally fascinating…and Daidie brought Ani over here ….and Daidie said Ani was totally mesmerized by doors that would automatically open…by escalators…by an actual toilet….as Daidie said she found Ani perched at one point on top of her toilet…about to do her business….

anyway I was staring at this Dharmsala spot on my ceiling…which had been created by a leak from the roof…and thought…this is REALLY irritating….so clomped down to the garage and found the old ..dust spider webbed enshrouded ..12 year old  paint can …flat Swiss Coffee….and thought …shoot I gotta get rid of that spider spot…..but had my doubts about paint still being good after so many years….well after tusselling (sp?)  with the top that did NOT want to come off….I got it finally  opened with a pair of pliers……. as a screw driver did not work….

I was shocked but  THE PAINT  WORKED!!!!

well THAT just made my day start off wonderfully……

I should perface this next annecdote…as my day ended so wonderfully with a friend who exposed me to the Century Twin Towers for lunch and then the vistas from the rooftops of wonderfully old downtown Los Angeles.. the charm of the LA Athletic Club……………a day of visual overload and amazement….honesty and commitment…..

I have had as you know like 7 long term relationships..of 2 years or more…..I guess because (before I found my self)…I was raised in the culture that you HAD to be in a relationship…marriage for straights….I mean when my older  sister and I grew up…if you were not “married”  in your 20’s …well something was wrong with you…..and this of course applied to generations before me….my mother’s and her mother’s etc …all the way back…….to Eve….

I must segue (sp?) …I saw the movie “The Help” today

…well only stayed for 2/3rds of it…the book I had read…..

…but what turned me SOO OFF…was how  I just HATE the way white woman were back then ….yes I guess I realize that they existed like this..only due to the fact if  I turn on the TV and see Bachman or Palin….

alas things  NEVER change…..

I could NOT endure this movie …as I felt I was tied to a chair being forced to listen to Sarah Palin or Michelle Bachman…..so I left…

and our “Help”  growing up back in the 50’s and 60’s ….were basically Norwegian Nannies

…and then my devine Miss  Alice…whom I will NEVER …EVER forget ..she was our laundress….and her ex use to pick her up in his Caddie…..she was just so wonderful…..she taught me how to iron….I would come back from St Albans and run downstairs to see her…..and we would joke, laugh  and she would chase me around the ironing board…she had a glass eye….

..she HONESTLY  was my best friend back then…from 4th grade to 12th….

as she was my mother’s …..

I have told you the story of her funeral…..

I was at Carleton  College in the Midwest and no one told me about it until after …..she had passed….as shoot I would have been there in a flash for my one and only TRUE  friend growing up all those formative  years…..

mother drove for hours by herself

..in our old Green Ford  ….airconditioningless (Father was not into “extras” on cars which back then were ..back up lights…side mirrors…FM radio and Air Conditioning )….. Station Wagon ….

down to this bleached white wooden  church in the wheat fields of Southern Virginia…..from DC…..

she said it was TRULY the most moving experience she EVER had….

she was the only white person there…it was hotter than Hell….

she was accepted as family….

which is the inclusive  way so many Black people are…….

I mean if she had motored down and everyone  there was White they would not have given her the time of day….

she was handed a fan…as she walked in…..and got carried away by the true emotion …jumping up and down…the room was clouded  by the  dust from the floor boards…..she was Sister Jane Matteson….from DC

when she came back home late that night she did not talk to anyone…not even Dad…she just went into her bathroom…and drew a bath ……

she loved Alice as I did……

True Friendship is a COMMITMENT…that you follow from meeting til death……

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