Life Is A Wager….

December 17, 2011

So said Christopher Hitchens…who died Saturday – one of the greatest intellectuals (whether you agreed with him or not) of this and the last century…..

 
He said that “Life is a wager”…in an interview with Charlie Rose when asked …since he had cancer did he regret having had a life of booze, cigarettes,and sex…..
 
he said he got more out of a bohemian existence….”writing is what’s important to me, and anything that helps me do that – or enhances and prolongs and deepens and sometimes intensifies argument and conversation…is Worth it to me…”
 
I TOTALLY agree with him…..there is a friend of mine…we can go out for a few drinks and just get into the depth of discussions of what is Important to us……after a night with this person……all of the shit of the day is swept away…and I am left with a Smile. a feeling of deep Content, and Total Happiness…..(sigh!!)
 
 
Christopher died at the age of 62….and I am already 65….as you get older ..death….becomes more in ones thoughts than one wants….basically as your friends start dying off….though I lost most of mine back in the 80’s with Aids…..
 
I frankly DO NOT fear death….I just don’t want any friends, lovers, or family  to have to put up with me….I was talking to my optometrist about this on Wednesday…I told him that is the only reason I have long term health insurance ….as I want a nice flat in probably Palm Springs…as it would be more enjoyable for anyone coming to see me….as opposed to what I witnessed yesterday with Jim in this God forsaken hell hole he is rehabbing in…..am going tomorrow to see him so hopefully I will feel differently….
 
 
I swear I am TOTALLY Illuminated watching Charlie Rose’s interviews….really the BEST show on TV….
 
another wonderful one this week was with Viola Davis who is up for The Golden Globes as Best Actress  for the movie “The Help”….but she faces her favorite Meryl Streep as well as Glen Close, Tilda Swindon, and Rooney  Mara  for “The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo”..
 
Viola grew up in “abject poverty” on her grandmother’s farm in St Matthews,  South Carolina… her mother  only had an 8th grade education…(like my Grandfather who went on to become Treasurer of the Great Northern Railroad.)….. her father only an 5th grade education… both her mother and her grandmother were maids…..and her grandmother had 18 children….(how I would LOVE to have heard her stories…….as I would my grandfather…he was born in NY from German immigrants who had NO money…..)
 
Viola at the age of 7 years old was so struck by Cicely Tyson….as she had been so desperate to see any image..(.in the movies or on TV)..that looked like her…
 
.I totally identify with that…as a young gay male …one looks for role models..to validate your existence…..to dispel the image that being gay was a  sickness …as it was thought for years……but I could not spot them readily by their skin color………….
 
 Viola as a child  wore shoe with holes in them…and faced terrible ostracism and racism when her family moved to Rhode Island…as they were the only black family in Central Falls…her father was a horse trainer…said..”when you are brought up in poverty – you do not have filters – sometimes we make judgment on characters because we have not observed them…just have heard about them….Every Crack addicted mother is NOT a monster…”
 
she went on “In Life you ARE always on the Path of Illumination..
 
You have to have great friends who can make you find it within yourself the will to be Who You ARE….
 
You ALWAYS get better when you work with People who are Excellent!!!”

One Response to “Life Is A Wager….”

  1. As always, you see the light through all the facets xxRob.
    How important it is to see the path of illumination when dejected and cannot view a forward moving vision. How majestic to SEE another, to really observe and practice the African greeting: “I see you”! Not I see your skin, your lipstick, your limp, your creed, your race, your sexual preference, your gender- but, I SEE YOU! A good relationship is fuel, and is a treasure and a pleasure to live in as it unfolds and uncoils new truths and new vistas…

    Life is a wager- but YOU choose your ensemble of friends who fuel and inspire your next breath.

    Much love dear friend,
    Catherine

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