In this weeks New Yorker:

“Alice Miller is the author of “The Drama of the Gifted Child” (1979) a study of parental narcissism and its effect on children who are not necessarily gifted with artistic talent or superior intelligence but are unusually attuned to the needs of others.  A fragile or depressive mother may use such a child as a mirror, but only to mirror what she wants to see.  The child is obliged to disguise the full range of her own feelings behind a mask of compliance.  She is rewarded with love for wearing  it and punished by rejection for trying to take it off”

And from New York Mag…Barney Frank says:

“Adam Clayton Powell was not the first Black member of the US. House, but he was the FIRST self-respecting Black member.

Powell got here in ’45 and he was told that he couldn’t use the swimming pool that was only for white people, he couldn’t eat in the House dining room, and he couldn’t get his hair cut.  So he said “The HELL I can’t” and he DID!!”

and in Monday’s New York Times in an article “For Two Economists, the Buffett Rule Is Just a Start” about Emmanuel Saez and Thomas Piketty …they feel that the “Buffet Rule”..does not go far enough….in changing the gap between the 1% and the rest …that it really should be a tax of more like 50 or 70 percent…as the wealthy are getting richer and the rest are simply not…

“From 2000 to 2007, incomes for the bottom 90 percent of earners rose only about 4 percent, once adjusted for inflation.  For the top 0.1 percent incomes climbed about 94 percent.”

I had lunch today with someone I have not seen for almost 50 years…one of 54 (I think) classmates from St Albans…the elite (unbeknownst to me at the time) school in DC I attended from the 4 through the 12th grade…the worst period in my life as I was bullied..rolled down stairs in trashcans….kicked in the balls daily during “recess” by Eddie Stowe and his goons….

I was a smallish thing – and could not qualify for the football team in 4th Grade…so was put in the joke group called “Troop 19″…..which I was in for all those years from 4th to 12th grade…much I am sure to my father’s he was a TOTAL jock and physically adept at everything from Boxing to being the Captain of the Football, Baseball Team in college…he was just a natural athlete….

After receiving many an email for “status” by our class “secretary” I thought what the Hell …and wrote I was Gay and wondered if any others were…(I was in the class of 64)……(I did not know I was gay until I was a Junior in College….)…and I said I would NEVER donate a penny to St Albans as it was the worst period in my life…Tom wrote back and said Are you sure you want me to post this…and I said well at 65 who the F… really cares …but some did and were appalled that I would come out….

well I had lunch with Bob Fawsett today…he was not a close friend at STA…but a nice guy…skinny and dressed back in the 60’s  like the Fonz with slicked back hair…was VERY skinny ….

well we met in Venice  at the Rose Cafe….we all have changed….after 50 years but his eyes are the same……he has I think 3 daughters and like 9 grandchildren from I think his first wife….he has been married 3 times…no children from the last 2 wives….. after St Albans he was in a band – worked for IBM in
Venezuela and the US…went into commercial Real Estate and was making a million a year…he was responsible for developing all the property from DC to Dulles Airport….and he said your time consuming  trip from the airport into town is my fault… he developed Reston Virginia….

but he retired at the age of 43 as he said he was making too much money that his ex-wife could get a percent of he went down to “making” nothing….

but he is one of the 1 percenters…and I said you must be Republican…he said Of Course…and then after he queried me more about my life and I told him that one of my sisters was a marvelous herbal specialist and farmer – lives in Oregon (where he and his wife take their RV to for 3 months of the year)…and that my other sister was a coach and  lived in Berkeley….that  .one of my brothers was a reknowned psychologist who has changed the way one handles and looks at people who are suicidal…. living on Bainbridge Island in WA   and my other a renowned Bird Savior and Specialist working for the DNR in Wisconsin…

as we got up from our table he said…Well you MUST be a Democrat for Obama…I said in my best Fargo North Dakotan accent:  “You Betcha!!!” but said I DO NOT TALK POLITICS with my friends who I KNOW are Republican…as at the age of 65 no one is going to change me nor am I going to change anyone else….so it is needless stress…and I love Life too much for that BS..

the one thing that he told me that for some reason I did not know …was about Eddie Stowe who kicked me in the balls every recess……I had heard years ago that Eddie had committed suicide…for which …back then I was Happy to hear…but after I told him how on graduating from St Albans in 1964 I travelled for 3 months through Europe with the book “Europe On 5 Dollars A Day”…. with 2 other classmates – Peter Bernhardt and John Calhoun  ( he told me John is a “lifer” in prison for murdering someone)- those 2 guys  were as different as oil and vinegar….we got car wrecked – shipwrecked on the Greek Island St Georgious – had to flee Greece before we were thrown in prison…..

anyway Bob told me… well while you were motoring around Europe….  the Summer of 64…Eddie Stowe went down to Rehoboth Beach….3 guys beat him almost to death….one night at the beach as the waves were crashing in…he lived ….but never was the same again…and committed suicide a few years later…

THIS made me VERY sad…even though I had hated him ……all of these years….

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