My Gay Family

November 4, 2013

I was just walking back from lunch at the “Idiot”…..with my burka on…and this VERY attractive Italian, swarthy, handsome boy/man in his early 20’s…walked by…he smiled at me and nodded…..

this took me back to 1973 when I was out watering my first lover’s lawn at 8937 Keith Avenue in West Hollywood….. in my speedos (sp?)…and construction boots…….he was probably my age….attractive…he looked at me and said “Do YOU want to get HOT??”…..

well at first I did not know what he meant by getting “Hot”…(I was SOOO naive back in those days)……it then clicked….

I was a VERY monogamous person …well really have always been…back then ..thanks to the movie “Gone With The Wind”..(only because it prevented my getting AIDS)……and identifying with Scarlett ..who was always needlessly “fiddle-de-deeing ” around …rather than grabbing the man she was attractive to and raping him…and THEN as she filed her nails….. saying “Fiddle-De-Dee”

I looked at my attractive suitor (Lord THAT is another old word)…… and merely said…no Thank you!!!!….a response which seems so so Archaic today…..

I have to say…as much as I wanted my Life to end.. ….. when I was in my teens…due to being bullied and hating my puny self…that well one just has to hang on for the long run…as I eventually about 20 years ago started liking myself….and MAN does the world TOTALLY open up for you……as all the fears fall off your shoulders like so many cobwebs ..as you dive nude into the moonlit Lake of YOUR Existence….

(an aside I am listening right now to Cher’s new album/CD “Closer To The Truth”…Track 4…that a VERY close friend/family member gave me….cannot tell you how much I love him and his husband —-they have been close to me for over 30 years)

I just returned from an Unforgettable weekend in Palm Springs…there was “Pride” (Gay) Parade …. on Sunday…and what touched me the most was the Large contingent of the Palm Springs High School marching down the street to celebrate Pride….nothing like a straight band in a Gay Parade to choke me up…something TOTALLY unthinkable back when I graduated in 1964 from St Albans

…and then all the local high schools with their LGBT supportive members…following….

the Mayor of Palm Springs is Gay…and his adorable young son and daughter rode with him in a golf cart…..

the fire department , the police department were all in the parade to celebrate …and even the LAPD (Los Angeles Police Depatment)… sent down an attractive contingent….in a LAPD Hummer….

this all took me back to the 70’s when West Hollywood (before it was a City)…..had their first Gay Parade….and I in my Speedos scaled up a rusty – loose from the wall – fire escape ladder to the top of what was then Rexall Drugstore on the Northwest corner of San Vicente and Santa Monica….it is now a bank building ….(my lover who was 20 years older wouldn’t do it…)

but that day the Sheriff’s Department was afraid of the mayhem the Homosexuals might do..whom might we rape…what damage would we do……..they were EVERYWHERE…and their helicopters …at least 3…flying like annoying mosquitoes…zooming in and out above us….

after the Palm Springs Parade…dear…dear Vance and Jeff…two very soft spoken men…who have been together for at least 24 years….had all of us…the Palm Springs family that I think Larry and Ed or was it Geoffrey with a G..who is a tad older than his husband the skinny wrinkle free Bobby…… named the “Boozy Bunch”…..there are like 40 of us – all sizes and ages …(well most more Mature ages)….to Spencer’s…

One of the best restaurants in Palm Springs…where they had taken over one wing of it….food and service sooo wonderful…company …so soo stimulating ..

you just wanted to hug everyone…..

as we left there was a beautiful classic car parked outside…. …and Trevor/Troy …he and his partner John are out here for a week from DC(and MAN can they Dance!!!)gave a totally wonderful cocktail party at their house on Saturday..they are the youngest couple after dear Mishu…in the Boozey Bunch….)…said well this must have been a police car….as look at the spot light mounted on the side…I told him back in my day….many a car added that feature as there were many a town that did not have street lights…and often one needed light to find out what the address or name was written on the mailbox on the side of a driveway…..with the dimly lit house far at the end…..

I have a biological family whom I totally love…

but then there is my Gay Family……and thanks to my dear friend wonderful wonderful (Reator) Ron (and man can he tear up the dance floor if you get him out there on it)……… who is really responsible for creating the Palm Springs family…..of us more ageless Gay men… has connected us strangers due to our real estate transactions.with him….(if you want to know what “Salt Of the Earth” means …you just have to spend a few hours with him)

The Luncheon that Jeff and Vance threw was one of those silky afternoons….it was soo dreamy that it took me back to the old chic B/W movies of Greta Garbo…who would take out her cigarette holder ….Clark would lite her cigarette…and she would blow smoke in his eyes….before grabbing his hand and floating onto the dance floor….

it was a truly memorable point in my life….

and to TOTALLY cap the weekend off…..

Oscar’s has a Tea Dance every Sunday….most of us went…..

well I honestly thought my dancing days were over…as I am 67…and I don’t remember my parents going to dance on a Sunday at my age…..I mean I have not danced in probably 7-10 years…..

Wonderful Nabil dragged me and his husband Jeff out on the floor…and gosh it all came flooding back those wonderful feelings of years ago…and the last time I hit the dance floor was at Studio One in West Hollywood…when Nabil yelled down off the fire escape “Robby Cher is Playing” I was outside smoking …like Garbo …..

.I raced up the stairs

….. this time I was LIVING The Memory…

it all came flooding back…I hope to die dancing…honestly…(but Gay/disco dancing..as I can’t country western …I mean DISCO was/is my Life)..

my newest friend.. a man whom I adore..as I do his partner Kim…Omar..who is a Fabulous Make-up artist …his day job …he works for the Kalamzoo (Michigan)….Water Company …said “Man can YOU Vogue!!! (a dance style that came out of Harlem in the 80’s …that Madonna made popular in 1990)

I cannot tell you how valuable …your families of friends are…..

I will be out “Voguing” until I leave this earth…

4 Responses to “My Gay Family”

  1. Jeff Slater said

    Robby, it was wonderful having you here for the weekend. It’s nice to see you anytime.

  2. Ed Sogolow said

    Robby we so miss you when your not here, it was great seeing you again. You need to come more often.

  3. Richard Steele said

    Hi Robby Well I am sorry we missed the weekend, but we were on our Honeymoon on the Italian Riveria ?, had a great time but missed the exciting weekend in PS. So, we shall make up for it the next time. Loved your accounting. Hugs Robert and Richard

  4. Omar said

    I believe this was when we first met, and you know, you are one of those persons that when you first meet you feel and know that are genuinely a good soul. We seem to dance up a storm when we are together, as they say, dance like no one is watching. Kim and I think the world of you, and for all those good decent single men in Palm Springs, Kim and I have taken to calling you “the best catch in Palm Springs”

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