Live Life NOW……

June 6, 2019

Gosh Summer has finally arrived in Palm Springs as temps are now in the 100’s….I just hope the night temps stay low as when they are in the 80’s one cannot open the windows in the early AM…..

 

My ducks are back hungrier than ever .. I cannot tell the young ones that I fed a few months earlier…as they have grown into their male or female suits and can Now fly….

 

I have been going through all my old notes and emails that I kept ever since I had a computer…and throwing boxes and boxes out…as well who wants to read all that stuff when I check out….they are meaningless to anyone but me and some of those love letter from Paula were ALL ABOUT her….

I came across a wonderful Commencement  address my Dad gave at St Paul Academy at their graduation ceremony in 1968…which I had Never read….it Really Encapsulated his Life …what one should dream and strive for….it touched home…

 

and then I came across a Large…almost poster size picture  of my mother’s father….who we called Gamp….it is a picture of he and one of his sisters lounging on a beach in NY (the Bronx…Brooklyn??)…in the early 1900’s…he was wearing one of those  two piece suits men wore back then…and his sister wore what women wore…totally covered up….but WOW was he Gorgeous….

 

and I came across alot of the old letters I had sent my mom after her mom died and her Father had had a stroke…I lived in West Hollywood with my lover Paul Millard and would travel down to check on my GrandDad every weekend….he had lost his ability to talk properly…and was ALWAYS concerned about his investments…and would say things that I had to wait patiently for …to understand

 

How I wish I had asked him More about his Life….as No One knew even my Mom….well he Never talked really at all…and was foreboding to approach…as that Old Generation of men were….as even my father was…as men back then you had to respect and Not question…I mean you address your friends father as “Sir”…..….whereas now fathers have become Best Friends….

I Totally had forgot how often I flew down to Houston …almost weekly to be with Dan…who had been my boss and  the Parking Manager at West Hollywood with whom I fell in love with …he Had the most gorgeous body…a Marine’s

… and making him have to give up his job and return to his wife who Insisted he come home…….and then I flew down and met Paula and fell in love with her too…we carried on like you cannot believe…it Truly was a Very Exceptional period in my life….this was like the early 90’s….I in all honesty could NOT perform sexually with her….even tho she said…as she slept in the middle of the bed…”Boys I AM the only one to get fucked!!!”

 

I guess the only sad thing about reading these old letters is that so Many are gone…Dan is gone….and my best friend Elizabeth Nesser …(Clark Gable’s sister-in-law) who was my business partner and Best Friend…but …in our West Hollywood  Shop “Elizabeth’s Staircase”…her letters are so Wonderful…she was 12 years older than me …with the Most Beautiful Violet Eyes….that just mesmerized you….and What fun she was…

 

we were in London on a trip for buying antiques for Christmas…and we had been out shopping since before daybreak….and were taking bags and bags back on the tube to our hotel ….well we had to change…at one station…she as we existed that train said “Oh we go up over and over there to that track”…which we did and got on a train that took us Exactly Back to where we had started….and when we stumbled off ..Elizabeth was laughing so hard as was I that she had to sit on a bench…and wetted herself…..

 

and then in Paris we had been shopping at at a Fancy sheet shop …d’Porthault…and had been wined and dined like for 3 hours…she went to the loo at the metro and somehow lost one of her shoes..as we realized on the plane back to London…as on her feet…. one was beige and the other black (she carried a Big Purse)

 

God I Loved that Woman…she could read my mind as I could hers…and we just has the BEST of times……I miss her to death!!!

 

A woman who volunteered at West Hollywood Hall where I worked…and helped me so so much…Bea Fitzsimmons….was like in her 70’s and had not much  money…had been born Italian…and I later got out of her had been born a Countess….her parents were murdered by the Nazi’s….her Mom raped…..their property stolen from them as they were cast into confusing poverty……

 

Bea was quite wonderful…smoked with a cigarette holder….had Gorgeous Thick Gray hair….. did not talk much but did say to me:

 

“Robert you Must Live Life Now and  NOT wait for the future!!!!”

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